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HERBS AND APPLES 




"To BE ALONE, TO WATCH THE DUSK AND WEEP 



HERBS AND APPLES 



BY 



HELEN HAY WHITNEY 

Author of "Songs and Sonnets," 
"Gypsy Verses," Etc. 




New York: JOHN LANE COMPANY 

London: JOHN LANE, THE BODLEY HEAD 

M C M X 



\<\\o 



Copyright, 1910 
By John Lane Company 



THE UNIVERSITY PRESS, CAMBRIDGE, U.S.A. 



I CI. A 273 7 '.':~' 



I give you this, the bitter and the sweet. 
It holds my heart, can you not hear it beat ? 
So poor a gift to put within your hand — 
Apples and Herbs ! — but you will understand. 



CONTENTS 

FAGK 

To Neighbor Life i 

The Unburied 2 

Up a Little Road 3 

On Cedar Street, Nkw York 4 

Che Sara Sara 5 

The Dead Wanton 6 

Leaven 7 

QUAERITUR g 

Love Land 9 

By the Western Gate 10 

For Music 11 

The Little Ghost 12 

Madonna Eve 13 

A Conversation 14 

Be Brave 15 

Forfeiture 16 

The Search 17 

Dust 18 

Nature's Child 19 

Veritatis 20 

vii 



CONTENTS 

PACK 

The Peacock zi 

Anticipation 22 

The Wayfarer 23 

Renunciation 24 

Arabesque 25 

The Architects 26 

Ambush 27 

The Scales 28 

The Old Tragedy 29 

Taboo 30 

The Rivals 31 

Alone 32 

Beneath the Mask 33 

Thoth 34 

Little Dancer 35 

Sic Itur ad Astra 36 

The Judges 37 

The Spring Planting 38 

An Impressionist Picture 39 

Such Help for Singing 40 

Tempus Edax Rerum 41 

The Coward .42 

The Lost Romany 43 

Compensation 44 

Untamed 45 

To Pervanche 46 

The Belle 47 

viii 



CONTENTS 



PACK 



Release . . . . , 4S 

The Thief 49 

I WILL Write Letters to the Grass 50 

Only This 51 

The Survivor 52 

Megaera 53 

The Song of Mokai 54 

To the Gypsy Man 55 

There is no Danger in Disdain 56 

The Playmate 57 

Afterwards 58 

The Old Maid 59 

Madness ? 60 

The Scholar . 61 

Wisdom's Secret 62 

Caged 63 

The Wife Speaks 64 

The Altar 65 



Ackno'wledgment is made to Messrs. Harper & Bros., 
the Century Company, The Metropolitan Magazine, and 
Collier's Weekly, for courteous permission to reproduce 
certain of the 'verses included in this ^volume. 



LIST OF ILLUSTRATIONS 



PAGE 



" To BE Alone, to Watch the Dusk and Weep " . . 32 
Frontispiece 

" Smiling She Flouts Demosthenes " 6 

The Peacock 21 

Little Dancer 35 

The Romany 43 • 

Pervanche 461/ 

'< And Wrap My Heart Close Shrouded in the 

Hours" 50 



XI 



HERBS AND APPLES 



TO NEIGHBOR LIFE 

Neighbor Life, I love you well, 
Have you any goods to sell? 
Let me buy or let me borrow 
Joy, to tide me o'er the morrow ; 
I will give you in exchange 
Baskets full of thoughts that range. 
Bright utensils of my brain ; 
Coins of feeling you shall gain. 
All I ask in equal measure 
Is your store of joy and pleasure. 
Neighbor Life, I love you well. 
Have you any joy to sell ? 



THE UNBURIED 

In the wood the dead trees stand, 
Dead and living, hand to hand, 
Being Winter, who can tell 
Which is sick and which is well ? 
Standing upright, day by day 
Sullenly their hearts decay 
Till a wise wind lays them low. 
Prostrate, empty, then we know. 

So thro' forests of the street. 
Men stand dead upon their feet. 
Corpses without epitaph ; 
God withholds his wind of wrath, 
So we greet them, and they smile. 
Dead and doomed a weary while, 
Only sometimes thro' their eyes 
We can see the worm that plies. 



UP A LITTLE ROAD 

Up a little road with the morning in my arms, 
Drenched with dew and tipsy with the madness 
of the May, 
Leafy fingers on my face, I stop not for your 
charms ! 
Love is waiting round the turn, to be my Love 
to-day. 

Shouting as I ride on the springing ringing sod. 
Ah ! my pony knows the goal to which his 
course is laid. 
Galloping thro' dawn he knows he bears a little 
god 
Bacchus-mad with happiness who burns to meet 
his maid. 



ON CEDAR STREET, NEW YORK 

I, WHOSE totem was a tree 

In the days when earth was new. 
Joyous leafy ancestry 

Known of twilight and of dew, 
Now within this iron wall 

Slave of tasks that irk the soul. 
To my parents send one call — 

That they give me of their dole. 

Thro' the roar of alien sound 

Grimy noise of work-a-day. 
Secretly a voice, half drowned. 

Whispers thro' the evening's grey, 
"Child, we know the path you tread, 

Ghost and manes, we are true; 
Cedar spirits, long since dead. 

Calm and sweet abide with you." 



CHE SARA SARA 

Deep as the permanent earth is deep, 

Fierce as its central fire, 
Man is his own conclusion. 

Woman her great desire. 



THE DEAD WANTON 

She was so light, so frail a thing, 
She had no wisdom but her face. 

Which caught men's fancy like the Spring 
Yet held them but a moments space. 

She is the youngest of the dead. 

And so the great lean round her feet ; 

They strive to learn from her fair head 
Why far-forgotten life was sweet. 

For now she knows what Plato knows. 
And lapped in languor she agrees 

With Kant, and as her soft hair blows. 
Smiling, she flouts Demosthenes. 




'•Smiling, she flouts Demosthenes" 



LEAVEN 

Others furnish bread and meat. 
Busy hucksters on the street, 
They will give you what you need, 
All the facts your life to feed. 

Mine are not these wares of earth, 
I can give my love but mirth; 
Let, oh let this part be mine, 
I would be your salt and wine. 



QUAERITUR 

What if to-day, when I have made so sure 
That love is utterly and wholly mine, 

What if I found that faith should not endure 
And all my trust in you I should resign ; 

That when I send my thoughts like homing 
birds 

To your dear heart they find no resting place, 
But all misunderstood, far, foreign words. 

They die away like strangers at your face. 

Love, make me certain, make the circuit true, 
And when I wonder, give the faith I seek 

Perfectly trusting, let me end in you 

Heart against heart, and cheek upon your 
cheek. 



LOVE LAND 

Where is El Dorado ? 

Where is bright Cathay ? 
These are lands where we should go 

To live and love to-day. 

Miles of glistening beaches 

Over all the sun, 
Tropic, spicy-laden breeze 

To lull when day is done. 

Gypsy lass and lover 

With the tides we 'd rove ; 

We be natives of no land 
Save the land of love. 



BY THE WESTERN GATE 

You and you only ! — By the Western gate 
That fronts the falling sun I shade my face 
And watch for you. As one who 's lost the 
race 

Tries to demand no further gift from Fate 

Lest he be hurled more low, so I, who wait 
And want you, ask no pity of your grace 
On my defeat, I only long to trace 

My lost heart; come to me, my need is great. 

I see the young men with their crystal eyes, 
They stand about my door, their hearts, I 
know 
Are breaking in the poppies that they bring. 
I cannot love them for I am not wise ; 
Ah, come, or else forever let me go, 

I grow so tired with waiting in the Spring. 



lo 



FOR MUSIC 

The Indian Summer and Love have fled, 
Oh, red, red lips like a crimson rose. 

Oh, slender hands with the tips of red. 

You are lost in the land of Nobody-knows. 

The sweet breeze blows but it comes not back. 

The water flows in a silver stream, 
But never returns on its moon-white track, 

They are gone, past recall, like a lovely 
dream. 

Ah, crimson lips like a tilted flower. 
Where sweetest honey awaits the bee ; 

Come back, come back for a single hour, 
Dear Love, my Summer, come back to me. 



II 



THE LITTLE GHOST 

The little one who loved the sun 

Who only lived for play, 
Ah, why was she the one condemned 

To dark and dreams for aye ! 

The perfect perfume of her life 

Was as a rose's breath. 
And now she treads eternally 

The gusty walks of Death. 



12 



MADONNA EVE 

From what far spicery derives your hair 

The sweet faint fragrance that enslaves my 
sense? 

What subtle love trick taught you to be fair 
With overt lure and covert reticence ? 

Madonna Eve, you bear upon your breast 
A hungry emerald like the desiring sea, 

But warm upon your heart lie pearls of rest 
What man could exorcise such witchery ? 



13 



A CONVERSATION 

" Laddy, leave your pedant's task, 

Rove the world with me. 
Fields and towns and pretty lands 

Together we would see. 
There be workers everywhere. 

You would not be missed. 
Come, ah come, and take for yours 

The mouth you never kissed ! " 

" Lady, I am fain for play, 

So I may not go. 
Only those who hate to toil 

The true enjoyment know ; 
But could you love a larrikin 

Whose task he'd so resign ? " 
" Yes ! — I 'd love a larrikin 

If only he were mine." 



14 



BE BRAVE 

Be brave about yourselves, you little ones. 
If in the crazy warp and woof you gleam 

With the insistence of determined suns. 

Shine, being true and modest in your dream. 

If to the peace of nature you respond 

Draw from her breast your milk, nor weep the 
high 

Duties for lack of which you now despond. 
Made for historic planets thro' the sky. 

Knowing yourself a gay and careless weed. 
Be you courageous in your light despair; 

Sure that you fill a space of unknown need. 
Idle and green in the bright coat you wear. 

Strive to the uttermost to find your worth. 
Jester or Gypsy, Body, Brain or Soul, 

Filling with perfect cheer your place on earth, 
So shall the tapestry of Time be whole. 



^5 



FORFEITURE 

So I have lost you. When the utter ache 
Shall fade at length to mere despondency 
What will the answer to this problem be? 

They say that nothing dies, that all we stake 

Brings some unknown return ; what then shall 
make 
An adequate exchange for love, to see 
Your hand held out in friendship ? — as for 
me 

The episode is ended, for life's sake. 

You want me still for that small joy I gave. 
But now it ends for you. I am not brave 

To love you seared ; I have no happy days 
To brood upon at dusk, and so I claim. 

As all the wager that good fortune pays. 
Complete obliteration of your name. 



i6 



THE SEARCH 

I TIRE of the struggle, the search for the ulti- 
mate I, 

There hangs the chalice of sapphire, the in- 
finite sky. 

Why thro' the space of despair should my spirit 
be hurled 

Seeking for truth, when beneath lies this pearl 
of a world ? 

Seers may direct us thro' pain to discover the 

soul. 
Comforting joy may not give us the absolute 

whole. 
But if the seers should be wrong, may the truth 

not be ours 
Thanking dear Life for its light and its beautiful 

hours ? 



17 



DUST 

Motes of the city dust, could this thing be 
That midst your myriad particles for me 
Might come one atom out of Ispahan, 
One spiced far memory of caravan. 

Indrawn upon my breath I 'd know an urge 
To dissipate monotony, and purge 
The spirit of its spleen ; one with the man 
Who takes the sun blue air of Ispahan. 



i8 



NATURE'S CHILD 

I HAD a friend whose soul was very fair, 

His word was wisdom and his strength was 
sure ; 

His courage in the ills he had to bear 
Made others strong and able to endure. 

I asked no love, no tribute of the sense 

For his companionship was recompense. 

I thought I was beloved, but did not care, 
He smiled on me as he on others smiled. 

But one grey day a chill was in the air 

And then to prove that I was Nature's child. 

He spoke — " I do not love you very much — " 

And all my friendship shattered at the touch. 



19 



VERITATIS 

Seated among the shards of Potiphar 

I pondered. Shall we still strive on ? forsooth 

There is no better, that is good as Best, 
There is no truer that is true as Truth. 



20 




THE PEACOCK 



THE PEACOCK 

She was more beautiful than tropic night. 
Luring, compelling as the smile of Fate ; 

Like a poor wastrel, I for her delight 

Squandered my soul and gained her idle hate. 

Peacock and paroquet ! — at last I know 

The sorriest songsters make the bravest show. 



21 



ANTICIPATION 

The joy is in the making. While we sow 

Our dream is wonderful with flowers, we name 
The purlieus of our garden and the aim 

Is worth the eflfort, yet we cannot know 

The garden will be just a garden, so 

The dream is heaven. This way mothers frame 
The child's high dedication to its fame, 

Repaid for all reality may show. 

God knows this, so He lets us have the best, 

The vast anticipation, rugged man 
Joys in the struggle, triumphs over throes. 
Vanquished a thousand times he still finds zest 

In hope and all his pleasure in a plan 
To be fulfilled at length in Heaven? — who 
knows. 



22 



THE WAYFARER 

Half way to happiness, 
The whole way back again, 

Stumbling up the stubborn hill 
From the luring lane. 

Little sunset House of Hearts 

Standing all alone, 
I could come and sweep the leaves 

From your stepping stone. 

I, and he, could light your fires 

Laughing at the rain 
But O it's far to Happiness, 

A short way back again. 



23 



RENUNCIATION 

Not what I ask, but what I do not ask, 
O my Beloved, proves my love for you. 

And love can set to love no harder task 
Than wistful silence, reticence to sue. 

I lock my lips, I force a wise content 
With all my being wailing for a sign. 

Ah, if men knew what woman's smiling meant 
When fierce and hard the heart cries out " He 's 
mine." 

Mothers of men are we, we barren ones 

Who say " Be happy, dear, and play your part." 

What matter how we yearn, you are our sons 
Whose every footfall breaks a woman's heart. 



24 



ARABESQUE 

Gold fish, rose and red 

As lady Lillith's hair, 
Mauve and blue as curling smoke 

And water-sapphires there. 

At the fountain's brim 

I built a little dream. 
As a goldsmith cunningly 

I made it flash and gleam. 

I wrought a maiden shape, 

I colored it with love. 
Scarlet mouth and breast of pearl 

And eyes of turtle dove 

Thro' hours of moony dark, 
I woo'd her for my bride 

But ah ! I could not build her soul, 
So with the dawn she died. 



25 



THE ARCHITECTS 

How shall we build It curiously well. 

Our house to live and love in ? — Shall it be 

Only significant to you and me, 
Or shall it be a palace where may dwell 
Those whom our spirits notice ? May we tell 

An architect to loose his fancy free 

To toss up towers in soaring ecstasy 
With Doric dignity or temple bell ? 
Or shall we build it with our hands, alone, 

Working together over wood and stone 
To learn an art we never knew, and strive. 

Patient, to raise with faith and trust and love, 
Fashioned so cunningly it must survive, 

A secret cottage in a silent grove ? 



26 



AMBUSH 

Crafty Chieftain, where you lie 
You can see the clouds drift by, 
Waiting in the dusky fern 
For your enemy's return. 

Does the beauty of that place 
Never tell you of my face, 
I, you left, to plot and plan 
For the ending of a man ? — 

You had better sought my aid, 
I have met him unafraid, 
We have wandered all alone 
Underneath a yellow moon. 

We have found the end of strife 
Is the waking up to life — 
Therefore you, who forced my vow. 
Take my all of wisdom now. 

Love has taught me but one truth — 
Love is merry, love is youth. 
We be children, he and I. 
Where is your sagacity ? 
27 



THE SCALES 

I WONDER If the Store of joy 

And love is limited, 
And if because my heart is glad 

Some other heart has bled. 

Believing this, a balance just 
Of recompense, I pray 

That my beloved gained the joy 
I did not have to-day. 



28 



THE OLD TRAGEDY 

Did I allure you ? — I only meant to love you, 
I only meant to be so dear you could not let 
me go. 
I held you close against my heart, bending down 
above you. 
As mothers brood above their babes, I loved 
you, loved you so. 

'T was passion that moved you, called to you and 
caught you ; 
You never felt my tenderness full launched on 
your desire. 
You never knew the friendship and sympathy I 
brought you. 
Ah, Mary pity women when their veins are 
filled with fire. 

And so I have lost you, I who never won you ; 
You thought me but a siren by your crafty 
arts beguiled. 
1 hate myself and scorn you for the honor I have 
done you. 
I leave you, bitter woman, and I came to you 
a child. 

29 



TABOO 

Now am I sacred, for that holy thing, 

Your touch, has made me as a god ; to-day 

1 am magnificent, I am a king 

To whom my fellow men must cringe and 
pray. 

Such is taboo ; but when to-morrow comes 
I may look once upon the sun and you ; 

Then, thro' the dawn, with wailing and sad drums 
I pay the utter price. — Such is taboo ! 



30 



THE RIVALS 

Seated in my ingle nook 

With Duty by my side, 
How I strove to see her charms 

And take her for my bride ! 

" Sweet," I said, " I love you so " — 

And suddenly I heard 
The laughing call of Beauty's voice 

And all my soul was stirred. 

Once again she cried my name 
And gone was every doubt, 

For who could stay at Duty's side 
When Beauty calls without ? 



31 



ALONE 

I ONLY wanted room to be alone. 

I saw the days like little silver moons 
Cool and restrained shine forth ; there were no 
noons 

To make me glad with glory, to atone. 

I dreamed of solitude. When one has known 
Ardent and eager verity, the tunes 
Of semi-truths are sweet, as subtle runes 

Attest the bud more dear than flower full blown. 

To be alone, to watch the dusk and weep 
For beauty's face that is so veiled, to know 
How exquisite the earth breaths come and go. 

To feel my life a silent, empty room 

Where lovely thoughts might take new shape 
and bloom, — 

This is the dream that is more dear than sleep. 



32 



BENEATH THE MASK 

I SAID that men were cowards, 
I thought that men were brave, 

I said that women gained no faith 
For all the love they gave. 

Beneath a mask of scorning 

I wore a heart of trust. 
But laughed in all my lovers' eyes 

And vowed their vows were dust. 

Time showed my words were true ones. 
My thoughts have proved no test, 

But still beneath my mask, I say 
I know my dreams were best. 



33 



THOTH 

Hewn from basalt, black as sin, 

Blind eyes staring, hands on knees,- 

This is Thoth, who shall survive 
All your fair divinities. 

Mars and Venus, piping Pan, 
White Diana, Cupid sweet, — 

All their beauty, all their pride, 
Lie like ashes round his feet. 

Vast and calm and ultimate 
Ere this orb dissolves in space 

Life's last glimpse to man shall be 
Thoth, with his impassive face. 



34 





LUCRETIA- VAN- HORN- 
LITTLE DANCER 



LITTLE DANCER 

O LITTLE dancer, slim as a new moon, 

A candle flame blown by the wind — how soon 

Will all this be forgotten ! Do you care 

The pagan poppies dying in your hair ; 

Do you despair to think that even as they 

Your lovely life will tarnish in a day ? 

How can we keep you, butterfly ! — O must 

Such lovely grace resolve itself in dust ? 

We must believe that some day when you lie 

Hid from the lights, beneath the open sky 

The trees will bend more perfectly above you. 

The flowers dance gayer for they '11 know and 

love you. 
And we will mind a little less the cold, 
Remembering your grace when we are old. 



35 



SIC ITUR AD ASTRA 

If it be educational to breast 

Salt lipped the wave that is the woe of Earth, 
Who could be called a fool? There is no rest 

From sorrow in this island of re-birth. 

And yet, ringed 'round with shadow as we are, 
In the penumbra we may all discern 

Glowing and gay the promise of a star 
For the adventurer with faith to yearn. 



36 



THE JUDGES 

Watch me, eyes of the wind and rain, 
See if I come to the dusk with stain. 

Search me, eyes of the soaring sun. 

See what mischief my hands have done. 

If there be beauty of word or deed, 
If there be truth or a scorn of greed. 

Give me the peace of your dark, sweet hours. 
Let me be still as your moon and flowers. 

If there be harm to a heart that trusts. 
If there be pander to sordid lusts. 

Curse and condemn me to wide-eyed pain, 
Judge, and pay me, eyes of the rain. 



37 



THE SPRING PLANTING 

" What shall we plant for our Summer, my boy, — 
Seeds of enchantment and seedlings of joy ? 

Brave little cuttings of laughter and light ? 

Then shall our Summer be flowery and bright." 

" Nay! — You are wrong in your planting," said he, 
" Have we not grass and the weeds and a tree ? 

Why should we water and weary away 

For sake of a flower that lives but a day ! " 

So she made gardens which he would not dig. 

Tended her apricot, apple and fig. 
Then, when one morning he chanced to appear. 

Sadly he noticed — "No trespassing here." 



38 



AN IMPRESSIONIST PICTURE 

" How do you do, " I said ; the yellow coat 
She wore was Hke a golden serpent's skin. 
I took her white gloved hand, my voice grew 
thin 

As tho* her hand were tight about my throat. 

The air was green with heat, a flaccid note 
I did not fail to see, for heat might win 
My cause; her weary soul looked from within 

And saw the white sails flapping on my boat. 

"Coolness and rest" my eyes were whispering, 
In Isles where morn grows never afternoon. 
Where Passion buds forever with the Spring, 
Nor wanes with shifting tides of sea and moon. 
But — " How are you ? " she said, and that was all. 
And tho' she smiled, she passed beyond recall. 



39 



SUCH HELP FOR SINGING 

Such help I have for singing ! 

The little winds a-stir 
Touch gently on the lisping leaves 

Like dainty dulcimer. 

The sights and scents of April — 

What dreams, what themes they bring 

While gaunt crows cry their gasconade 
Down all the ways of Spring. 

Such happy help for singing ! 

And round, below, above 
The air is thrilling with my joy 

Of love, love, love. 



40 



TEMPUS EDAX RERUM 

Upon the silence of my unconcern 

The little noise that was your name falls dead. 

I can remember how your mouth was red. 
In the lost years, but tho' the senses yearn 
For some unguessed desire, they never turn 

To that vitality, your face ! — We sped 

So swiftly thro' our burning hour. We said 
Drink deep, 't will never end ; too late we learn 
That lovely passion's face so soon is grey, 

That notes too often pressed upon grow dumb, 
That after the high climax crowns a day 

The dusk seems long and empty. We who 
come 
To taste again Life's feast, why must it be 
We meet such ghosts to chill our revelry ? 



41 



THE COWARD 

Wishful of many honors, 
He was too lame to climb. 

And so he sat to wait for Death, 
Forgetting to be brave. 

He never saw the windfalls. 
From off the trees of Time, 

Drop down in mellow chance to him 
The while he digged his grave. 



42 




THE ROMANY 



THE LOST ROMANY 

The Romany has gone, he has taken all my 
kisses, 
I knew I could not keep him, so I laughed 
and let him go. 
I do not know the road where his freedom and 
his bliss is. 
So take my sober spinning where no gypsy 
winds can blow. 

I will find my life serene, I will wed a pleasant 
lover, 
I may think no more of perfume and the lin- 
gering in the lane ; 
I will rear me sturdy children, and my soul I will 
discover. 
For I will not love a Romany in all this world 
again. 



43 



COMPENSATION 

If one grew blind thro' gazing 

Wide-eyed upon the sun, 
What matter when such memoried light 

Would last till life were done. 

If one should die of loving, 

Divinely wild, and brave. 
What matter with such dreams to dream 

Within the quiet grave. 



44 



UNTAMED 

Ah, we weary so with kisses, 

Weary so with your caresses, 
As the hooded hawk returning 

To its tinkling bells and jesses. 
So we flutter to the prison 

Of your arms, in meek surrender, 
And we grieve when you are angry. 

And we smile when you are tender. 
But our souls, untamed, are soaring 
Where no blandishments can teach them, 

Free our hearts, and free our spirits. 
Where your hands can never reach them. 



45 



TO PERVANCHE 

If you were mine — (for all the little flowers 
That see you, weary of their innocence) — 
If prayers that have been pale with penitence 

Grew purple with our passion, all the hours 
From sun to sun would be unique with bliss. 
Little red mouth that is not mine to kiss ! 

You are not mine and you will never be, 
And so I am magnanimous, I give 
My love and you to Time, and you shall live 

Bride of his avid passion. I will see 

The moon of all this lure and beauty set, 
And I will turn from you and quite forget. 



46 




PERVANCHE 



THE BELLE 

She spread her atlas petticoat 

So rare, so fine to see. 
Her bonnet was of Tuscan straw, 

Her shawl was Turkey red. 
She peacocked gay before men's eyes, 

This lady of degree, 
On slippered tiny feet, and ah ! 
She wished that she were dead. 

At every ball, at every rout 

She was the toast of town ; 
But no one knew who called her cold 

What cruel wound had she. 
The laughing gallant that she loved 

Had scorned her high renown. 
And now another bore his babe. 

And held it on her knee. 



47 



RELEASE 

How may we be released from memories ? 
One dreads each green renewal of the grain, 
Reviving ancient life. If but the brain 

Might be made clean of last year's withered lies, 

Blown like brown leaves across the April skies 
In hateful resurrection, and retain 
Only the springs of promise, fine and sane. 

And a kind, leading hand to make us wise. 

If with the running sap a royal birth 

Each year might be accomplished, strong and 
free 
With the sweet prescience of virginity. 

Then were we true inheritors of earth. 
And the large lonely stars no more should see 
The age worn phoenix-lives that make our 
dearth. 



48 



THE THIEF 

Did you see the rascal with the rain-grey eyes ? 
He robbed me of my happiness before I knew 
its worth. 
He stole into my garden and took it by surprise, 
When midnight hid his wicked ways upon the 
sleeping earth. 

How shall I arrest him, for he took away my 
Spring, 
Took away my April 'neath his cloak of steam- 
ing rain. 
Tho' he left his Summer and a choir of birds that 
sing. 
Nothing will content me for I want my Spring 
again. 



49 



I WILL WRITE LETTERS TO 
THE GRASS 

1 WILL write letters to my friend the grass, 
I will sing all my songs to lilac flowers 

Gather the spices in the airs that pass, 

And wrap my heart close shrouded in the 
hours. 

I dread man's huge impertinence ; he creeps 
Thro' the inviolate silences of Spring 

Like a marauder, waking that which sleeps 
To gather strength for lyric blossoming. 

I will write all my letters to the grass. 

The world shall be resolved into a cry 
Faint as a little voice that cries Alas ! 

And I will laugh alone beneath the sky. 



50 




"And wrap my heart close shrouded in the hours" 



ONLY THIS 

We need demand no further gift from Heaven, 
We might dispense with documents and creeds, 

If but this one great grace to us were given — 
The strength to follow where our reason leads. 



51 



THE SURVIVOR 

Beauty will crumble with tasking, 
Love rarely lasts for a year. 

Virtue is sold for the asking. 
Bravery fades before fear. 

Youth never lives till the morrow, 

One thing of all is alive, 
Joy cannot quench it, or sorrow. 

Folly alone shall survive. 

Folly, from cradle to burning. 
Toys for the great and the small. 

None shall escape her by learning — • 
Folly has rattles for all ! 



52 



MEGAERA 

Always to suffer so, to want and weep 
With woe that groweth every day more deep ; 
To don the green robe of tormented scorn. 
And ever curse the hour that love was born ! 
Furies, my Sisters ! have you no surcease 
For me to whom no death shall bring release ? 

They name me Jealous One. They hate my 

name. 
The ages hold me high to endless shame ; 
How, if I suffer so, does no one care 
And pity, for the wrath that I must bear ? 
Gods ! let me go, your service wrecks and sears. 
The vase must break that holds so many tears. 



53 



THE SONG OF MOKAI 

He's dead, I watched him die. 

He cast a spell on my mate, 
They loved, and the moon whirled 'round the sky, 

They mocked at my rage and hate. 

Blood red from the burning sea 

The sun rose, and I knew ! 
My soul whined wild little songs to me, 

I did what I had to do. 

I have taken the bone of his thigh, 

I have fashioned it into a horn ; 
And I sing my soul's song, shrill and high, 

And curse the day he was born. 



54 



TO THE GYPSY MAN 

Is there no room in your gypsy heart 

Where a woman's love might He 
Warm and sheltered, your prize and song. 

As you wander beneath the sky ? 

No, for you say, " I '11 carry no weight, 

I must be free, be free ; 
I '11 carry no love in my gypsy heart 

To make a drag for me." 

Little you know, then, love is the cloak 
That shelters you from the storm ; 

Love makes the shoes for your gypsy feet. 
Love is your coat so warm. 

Though you take no purse and you take no staff 

You cannot escape the load 
Of a woman's longing and woman's love 

That follows you down the road. 



55 



THERE IS NO DANGER IN 
DISDAIN 

There is no danger in disdain. 

No grief in perfidy ; 
The meek they are who taste of pain 

And matchless misery. 

The hearts who give, and giving, die. 
Could they but learn the way 

To take, and laugh and then deny. 
They still might live their day. 



56 



THE PLAYMATE 

Brown boy running on a wide wet beach. 
Free as the water and the wind are free ; 

Eyes of an odalisque and skin of a peach, 
O for such a playmate to play with me ! — 

Drenched with the sunshine of the long brave 
hours, 

How we would tumble in the white wild spray ; 
Then, drowsy children, fall asleep like the flowers. 

And wake keen and merry to a new clean day. 



57 



AFTERWARDS 

You know how I came to you, 

World beaten, tossed aside ; 
Ready for death at a hangman's hand, 

Stript of all hope or pride. 

Leaning, you gathered me up 

Close to your great sweet heart. 
Lulled me and told me to be a man, 

Taught me your wonderful art. 

Now I am very wise. 

Proud with your love's true vow ; 
Glorious with power, — I am more than a man, 

What will you do with me now ! 



58 



THE OLD MAID 

Ah, Heaven ! How soofi my body will be old ! 

I powder and I perfume and I tire 

With the long wasting of my one desire. 
I choose fair colors, furs, and antique gold 
To draw men's eyes and hands, and yet how cold. 

How careless are their eyes. I see the fire 
Flame from my neighbor, and I can aspire 
To only friendship. I have tried the bold. 
The luring attitude, the timid mien. 

The boyish, wise, or simple, all in vain. 
I know the women laugh at me, but oh, 
How can I let my dreamed perfection go ? 

I am a woman, I must have a man 

Only to ratify my nature's plan. 



59 



MADNESS ? 

They say 1 'm mad because I stare 
And look as tho' they were not there, 
Because I only speak when aught 
Occurs to me by way of thought. 

Instead of serving Fashion's creeds, 
I cut my coat to fit my needs. 
I laugh at grief and only weep 
When noisy life disturbs my sleep. 

My dreams are delicate and wild ; 
Was ever wise man so beguiled? — 
Mad, am I mad ! — then pray that you 
May some day hope for madness too ! 



60 



THE SCHOLAR 

From what sweet masters have I fathomed 
doubt. 

What love and laughter taught me to be blind; 
How patient did they point the letters out 

Latin and Greek to my bewildered mind. 

Now I am very wise, I know the *a' 

The little *a' of doubt's first faint distress 

Then, letter perfect, I recall the way 
Thro' all the alphabet of bitterness. 



6i 



WISDOM'S SECRET 

Coerced by Furies who persuaded me 
That life was imminent with idleness, 

Their jibes made mad, their lashes aided me 
To grasp the accident of bitterness. 

Come storm ! I cried, come passion and 
despair. 
For calm inhibits growth ! — I called on 
fire 
To sear my comfortable days, and wear 

The nights to wastes of torment and desire. 

Then pausing breathless, in a little wood 
I met with Wisdom laughing in the sun ; 

She said, " Lie still, for idleness is good. 
And grow In peace as I myself have done." 



62 



CAGED 

Once I had wings — I had no heart to fly. 

They put me in a cage, I did not die. 

They tamed me, taught me tricks and bade me 

sing; 
I waited, bore it patiently ; one thing 
I knew, that some day it might be 
The cage would open and I should be free. 
I waited endlessly, — at last the day ! 
Faint with delight I thought to fly away, 
Ah, but the mockery of that open door ! — 
My wings were powerless, I could fly no more. 



63 



THE WIFE SPEAKS 

Not all those women you have loved and left, 

O my Beloved, can stir my jealousy ; 

Not the light loves which you forgot for me. 
For my heart's fingers made by life most deft 
Have mended all the rents their arrows cleft 

And from their old enchantments set you free. 

But one is my despair, and only she. 
The one who loved you, hopeless and bereft. 

How can I give as much, who hold your heart 
As she, unloved who gave with scorn of gain ? 

So do the angels; at her name I smart 

And feel a sordid bargainer who gives 

For fair exchange ; I cannot heal the pain, 

I am defeated by her while she lives. 



64 



THE ALTAR 

Some take comfort from a star. 

Thro* the slow grey surge of Time, 

Some take joy from ruddy war, 
Lust of conflict, heat of crime. 

In these days of codes and creeds, 
Gods may wander newly born. 

Every day for each man's needs 
Bringing blessings thro' the morn. 

I will take a happy word, 

Open heart and hand for play. 

And a song which none have heard 
For my altar of the day. 



6s 



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